HomeMy awesome SHORT story
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Sword_Kill- Posts : 15
Join date : 2009-05-17
Location : Canada Eh?
Re: My awesome SHORT story
Aiyumie Fri Jun 19, 2009 10:58 am
Lmao... i died? watcha talkin about.. im rite here :>
Aiyumie- Posts : 42
Join date : 2009-05-17
Age : 30
Fimbulvtr- Admin
- Posts : 57
Join date : 2009-05-16
Age : 31 -
Killerjj666- Posts : 19
Join date : 2009-05-25
Age : 31
Location : The 15th dimension -
Re: My awesome SHORT story
Sword_Kill Wed Jul 01, 2009 2:27 am
thx...it took me quite some time and thinking to come up with it...how do you like my conclusion, was it good?
Sword_Kill- Posts : 15
Join date : 2009-05-17
Location : Canada Eh?
Re: My awesome SHORT story
Killerjj666 Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:54 am
You need to build suspence, like our english teacher says. For example.
Chapter One; Intro
Once apon a time, yumie fell.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Two; Suspence
Yumie has been lying down on the floor for the past 16 hours...
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Three; The Kick
Yumies body starts to decompose.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Four; The End
Yumie has been brought to the hospital, and has died.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Sorta Thing.... Learn from the better sword.
(Btw spelling might suck balls.)
Chapter One; Intro
Once apon a time, yumie fell.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Two; Suspence
Yumie has been lying down on the floor for the past 16 hours...
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Three; The Kick
Yumies body starts to decompose.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Chapter Four; The End
Yumie has been brought to the hospital, and has died.
KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?"
Sorta Thing.... Learn from the better sword.
(Btw spelling might suck balls.)
Last edited by Killerjj666 on Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:55 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : KillerRanger Screams, "IS SHE ALRIGHT?")
Killerjj666- Posts : 19
Join date : 2009-05-25
Age : 31
Location : The 15th dimension -
Re: My awesome SHORT story
Sword_Kill Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:57 am
AAA ok i see...im currently in the process of writing chapter 2 of this story. I'll be sure to listen to those tips of yours.
BTW, is she alright?
BTW, is she alright?
Sword_Kill- Posts : 15
Join date : 2009-05-17
Location : Canada Eh?
Killerjj666- Posts : 19
Join date : 2009-05-25
Age : 31
Location : The 15th dimension -
Aiyumie- Posts : 42
Join date : 2009-05-17
Age : 30
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